my personal trainer

This morning, Johari didn't want me sitting in a chair with her. So I got on the floor to stretch my back out a bit and stuck my legs in the air. When she saw me doing this, she got off the chair and went over to try to get out the yoga mat. She was trying to pull it out and insisted that we roll it out. Then, I did sun salutations while she ran around me and used me as a jungle gym. I have been needing to start doing some yoga at home and she was my personal trainer and motivator today. Maybe we can make it a regular routine. I thought it was so interesting that she thought to pull it out so immediately because we have only had that yoga mat here for a couple weeks and only rolled it out once or twice since it arrived. And yet she was so honed in to what was needed to "properly" get my stretch on.
Unfortunately we watched a bit of TV this evening. It was on, not by my choice. And I didn't feel like making the effort to get away from it. To be honest, I was kind of interested in the show...it was about this "super smart" kid in India who was wanting to find the cure for cancer. Oh, well. Let's just not make it a habit to sit in front of the TV.
The baby doll ruined nap time today. Blame it on the baby doll. Johari brought her to nap time for the first time. And she took turns with the baby doll nursing. She ended up just playing and flopping around in the bed until she decided that she wanted to go get some food downstairs. I tried to wait it out to see if she could settle herself, but her settlings didn't last long enough for her to fall into sleep.
Will we make it to Belize this winter? That is the question. Can we make it happen in a peaceful and fun way? Can we meet a friend there to have a good time? What is in store for us this winter time? New travels. I feel like if I could make it happen, then it would be another step toward knowing that we will have a life of traveling together.

telephones and video chats....

Johari is starting to add to her verbal repertoire. She is saying "dog" now. Which sounds more like "og". I also finally started to put together her "Who Loves Baby?" photo album. She likes to look at and point at everyone while I say each person's name. She even had her baby doll looking at it and pointing at each person as well. So she is attempting a few names at this point. She tries to say Zola but it comes out as just her tongue going lalala without any sound at all. She tries to say Cec-y, sometimes it just sounds like "ssss" but today it sounded a little more like cecy. When she is trying to say Mia, it ends up sounding like "mama".
We have discovered the joy of rubbing noses. It is great fun. You should really do some nose rubbing with someone today...as long as they don't have the cooties, of course.
I am really in my reading mode right now. Those times when I just wish I had a ton of time to read because there is a lot that I would like to absorb right now. And then I have lulls in my reading drive as well. But now is one of those times on high without a whole lot of time to read in a day. A few minutes here and few minutes there. So I am reading Playful Parenting and I have been working on A Girl Who Married a Lion which is short stories from Zimbabwe and Botswana written by Alexander McCall-Smith. I also just started Mother-Daughter Wisdom: Creating a Legacy of Physical and Emotional Health for when I am downstairs and have a few moments to read. All of them have me thinking about parenting and being the daughter that I am and the relationships that we have with people. And the amount of ourselves that we are willing to give in our play with each other and in particular with the children in my life.
I just got back in touch with a friend from the school that I taught at in Tanzania. She is working at a Baha'I school in Canada not too far from here. We got to chat and catch up a bit last night. It was good to hear about how various people are doing. And wonderful to speak to her. I hope that I can go visit her in Canada in the next couple of months. It made me feel good to get to talk to her for a bit though. I went to bed in a good mood.
Now Johari and I have done 2 video chats together. She was extremely shy on the first one. And was a bit apprehensive on her second video chat but she was able to be brought out a bit by the chatter...Silly Sarah. A few funny faces and some fun words got her smiles going. Did we have to figure out what the phone technology was when we were toddlers or did people not think to put the phone to our ears back then? I don't remember trying to figure out what the heck a phone was and why was someone talking to me but not there. It is interesting that she pretends with phones all of the time...in the bath tub today she had a whole lot of calls coming into her old school phone rattle. But when I put the phone to her ear with Mia or anyone else talking to her, she gets an incredibly intense look on her face and seems a bit uncomfortable with the whole thing.
I have to run.....mama time is over for now.

Cheese of our Nation

Who needs the pants? I'll be warm!

I am finally trying to write for myself again. I have desperately needed to get back to journaling for my mental health. And just began again. And just got back to Johari's journal too. I find journals so valuable. As a process more than anything. It is more about the process, the thinking and the outlet than about the product. The product is just a different benefit. It gives me a place to process what I am dealing with for my journal. And a place to be intentionally observant for Johari's journal.
So I got a gift from my good friend, Danny, today. A PC camera for video chatting. I am excited about its prospects. That I will be able to video chat with all of my loved ones around the world. WOW!! That is powerful. That Johari could see people that we can't drive 10 minutes to visit. That her and Mia or Zola or other friends could talk to each other on the computer one day. Maybe she could sign some stuff to people!
Yesterday, Johari started carrying a little leash around. And then later she decided that she wanted to put it on her little cat stuffed animal. So I put a rubber band around the cats neck to be the collar and we attached the leash. Then she dragged that cat around the house. It looks like it is being hung half of the time. But she walks it around the house as she stays busy caring for her baby doll.

I put my pet cat on a leash. I like to drag her around the house. Meow!

Today, she sat her baby doll at her little table. First she put her in one of the chairs. She insisted on getting a container of salad out of the refrigerator. She got a piece of avocado out of the salad and fed it to her baby doll. Then she wiped the baby's messy face. Then she got her on the table to feed her better. Johari has grown to love American cheese (much to my dismay...oh well.) She loves it. She asks for it even more often than she wants to eat it. But sometimes she gobbles it up. She decided to share that love of American cheese with her baby doll today.

Sharing the love of American cheese with her baby.

Yum. Fake cheese.

Baby's eyes show how much she loves her cheese.

Hey, there.

Ugg...Jelly Love

JELLY LOVE!!!

I fully experienced Seattle traffic now twice. The first time was in trying to go way south past the city to pick up my car which was shipped via train. We barely made it there in time. But I got my car. The trunk was full of toys and other odds and ends. So it was kind of fun to unload all of that. And have another influx of toys. The second time in Seattle traffic with rain and all was this evening just heading into the city to have dinner with friends so Johari could play with Carmel. They had fun playing.
This is some good times with her hat. Hat silliness.

HAT HEAD!!!!!

Johari has finally decided to accept some hard soled shoes in her life. She is ready to branch out in her footwear. I only really started wanting her to wear shoes with soles recently when the little leather bottoms weren't protecting her from the elements any more. Soggy, cold feet. She was given these Uggs last year that now fit perfectly and are snuggly warm too. Maybe she was just waiting for the right stilo to come along. The last couple of days she has been wearing these boots around.
Johari has some markers now. I am hoping that this makes it easier for her to express and create. Masterpieces may be in the works soon.

L L L L L L L L L L L L L

Last night, I watched Michael Moore's movie, Sicko. I wasn't particularly surprised by what was in it, but definitely sickened, angered, and fearful of living in this country. I thought it was interesting when someone in the movie said that a difference between France and the U.S. is that the government fears its people in France whereas the people fear their government in the U.S. How can we change this? What will it take? I ended up feeling like I need to find another country to live in sooner or later. But hopefully not too much later...
I had to register to vote for the first time in my life this week. Not because I want to vote...in order to be able to get a driver's license here in WA. I need something else establishing my residency so that I can get the driver's license. I have never been called for jury duty either. I have always wondered if there is some connection there. I guess time will tell.
Johari was practicing her "L" sound this evening. Very cute with that little tongue getting pointy and touching her upper lip. Sing-songing the L sound. So amazing to look into her face while she is discovering and playing and learning. It is a true joy!
Wednesday and Friday, we took a hike that is not too far from the house. (A short drive.) It is a nice hike downhill to the water's edge and then back up again. It is nice because Johari gets to run around and explore on the beach mid-hike before I have to make the ascent. There is a stream that runs next the trail where salmon go up to spawn. It is amazing to watch them struggle against the currents with such purpose. Here is one that was just heading out of the ocean and into the stream. He had some scary teeth!!!
Lua and Johari have great fun playing together. Johari likes to crawl all over her at times and snuggle her. It is precious. And Lua is so very kind and accommodating to Johari's desires and demands. She will read Johari books over and over again. Lua builds towers and Johari knocks them down. What a team!!
Johari's independence and drive to do her own thing puts a big kink in my exercise plan. She doesn't want to get in the jogging stroller and chill out there. Plan B? Or is there some way to get her to want to be in that stroller for a chill out session?
Some nights I really have dreams that stick with me and are strange. They linger for hours after I wake up. The strangeness and the feeling within the dream. I hardly ever used to remember my dreams pre-Johari. I guess I was a sound sleeper back in those days. Dreams can be pretty interesting though. Who pops up in them. What the setting is. And so on.
Johari had her own miniature shopping cart at the grocery store this evening. Which would have been perfect except that it was one of those carts that has a serious pull to the left which she was unable to compensate for to keep it going to straight. And she didn't want me or her grandma touching or helping the cart in any way because she is an independent young woman. She insisted that we needed cans of tomatoes. She kept loading up her cart with canned tomatoes.
Sleep has been a bit off with Johari for a few days. I think for people who are not parents it must sound so mundane how much parents of little ones particularly talk about the sleeping habits or non-habits of their children. But as a parent, it often seems so critical to the child's well-being and the parent's. Just skip the sleep talk if it seems mundane. She was taking these super late naps that would be pretty long and then friends would come to play with her before her bedtime, so she went to bed one night at 10 pm!! Seems really late for a little bean like her. I am going to try to get back into a decent pattern again.
Johari and I went to a trial music class together this week. I want to replace the Wiggleworm spot in our lives. Of course, because we were going to the Wiggleworms classes in Chicago and enjoying them, I kind of expected that this class would be pretty similar and it wasn't. It felt much more hippy and a bit more cheesy to me. Very little guitar playing. More acting and swaying and tapping out beats. It wasn't bad. It just wasn't Wiggleworms. But we will probably sign up for it in January anyway. Just because it would be nice to have some activity for us to have fun at regularly. I am singing with her a lot and playing the Wiggleworms CDs that I have for her several times a day. Whenever we are walking anywhere, she always insists that we do the "Walking, walking, hop, hop, hop..." song and routine. Also, she is starting to sing parts of other songs like the one where you stick out your tongue and sing about catching raindrops, snowflakes and sunbeams. She has got the singing with your tongue sticking out part down pat. She is also always asking for music to be turned on.
Mia and I were talking on the phone the other day. She asked me if I could go to the circus with her on Saturday. It was sad and sweet to me. I wished it was that easy for her to just ask and for us to just be able to show up 3 days later to go to the circus with her for a few hours. My heart went to the circus with her today. She is in my heart as always.

Richard Scarry....

My dad bought Johari a book. Richard Scarry's Best Word Book Ever. The book totally brought me back to childhood and looking through it. The pages that I could probably look at an imagine about for a long time. Johari liked to look at it to. It is good for being able to work on her sign language as well since there are so many pictures of different things going on and animals and planes, trains, cars. All the words you might want to talk about. I recommend checking it out. I think it is one of those books that will be good to look at for a while through different stages of development. It had some words in it that I have never heard of like...hassock (which looks like an ottoman or something) and xiphias (which looks like some type of swordfish). Well, maybe those were the only words that I didn't recognize. But some of the things in it are way outdated or soon to be outdated...but that makes it even more nostalgic.

play potty and dog dealings

Today we tried out the stroller sleeping bag aka BundleMe. And it seems to have worked. Johari fell asleep on the run. I guess that could be contributed to an early waking as well, but it is nice to think that she was so snuggly and cozy that she just decided to take a little snoozer. It made me feel like I should keep running longer, but those hills have me challenged mentally and physically.
Johari was very interested in Lola today. She wanted to sit close to her and wanted me to sit with her close to Lola. But I don't trust Lola with the little ones. She is an old grouchy lady, what can we say. I guess she deserves to be an old grouchy lady after about 15 years of life. She showed her true colors this evening with a bark and lunge at Johari. No bites, no real drama except scaring Johari and me. And reminding me to keep on my toes with Lola and Johari around. Johari was upset but she seemed to get over it very quickly as well.
I decided to get Johari a potty. Not really thinking that she is going to be potty trained right now, but to have it around for when the time is right. She likes to pretend with it and imitate what she sees me doing with the potty. So she wanted to go through the whole motion of getting her pants down and sitting on the potty. She really wants to communicate in many ways so I figure if we start trying to communicate more about potty issues we may be able to get the potty work going in a few months. Who really knows though. Time will tell. And for now, it is just fun for her to mimic by pretending to use her potty.
I didn't get to escape during Johari's nap today. Which means I didn't get a mama time break in the middle of the day. I guess I got a needed short nap, but mama time is important too. And Johari didn't get a long nap either because of it.
I was thinking about what it means to live in the suburbs today. Whether I like it. What are the differences. I miss just being able to walk to a little cafe or something like that to hang out. Or walking down a street with other people and interacting with them in different ways. In the suburbs, when I am running I pass an older couple and we greet each other but mostly people are in their cars. I guess if I go down to the pond, I bump into people that I greet. The shopping places around here don't have much character, just strip malls. I guess there must be places that I haven't discovered yet that have character. I thought about how I need to find a cafe hangout for myself here. A place that would be relatively convenient and cozy and comfy. There are benefits to the 'burbs as well. More trees and grass. Less shady stuff going down on the streets. And all that.

We are the ones that we have been waiting for....

I was listening to Sweet Honey and the Rock this evening. I haven't heard them in a long time. The first song the came on was "We are the ones that we have been waiting for." I thought of Cec-y. She recently told me that that is one of her favorite quotes. I had never thought about it much before. And I think about it's meaning now when she told it to me and when I listened to it play over and over this evening. And I thought of my dear friend, Cec-y, and why she loves it so much. It is a truly powerful quote.

Cooking squash and pumpkin

I was cooking pumpkin and squash today. The thought of cooking pumpkins and eating them for dinner always brings me back to Mma Ramotswe in Botswana. Those days when I was buried in the world of the No. 1 Ladies Detective Agency. I think of how she always talked of cooking pumpkin for dinner. I wish I knew how she did it. What is Mma Ramotswe's recipe for pumpkin dinner.
We didn't have any playdates or outside contact today. Which makes the day feel a bit lacking. We were used to having a guaranteed visit from friends every day in Chicago. We do get friend visits here and we do try to go visiting across the street but I am not sure what the limitations with that should be. That's what I loved about living at Ruaha School in Tanzania, I could always go visit someone in the community. And that's what I loved about living above my dear friends and family on Monticello, visiting, visiting, visiting, hanging. But with new folks, it is hard to know if they would want us to be stopping by every day to play. We'll figure it out.
I got a run in today. But Johari doesn't want to wear her mittens for very long. In fact this morning on the jog, she took of her mittens, then the blanket and eventually she took off her hat too. Her hands end up so cold. So I am going to try a new product on our next run. Basically like a little sleeping bag that attaches to the stroller.
We ran errands this morning. The Great Harvest Bread Co here doesn't seem to have the same perfect cookie as E-town- oatmeal chocolate chip. I will survive though.
Johari has taken one good long nap the past couple of days. I may be jinxing that as I write this. But 2 1/2 hour nap is nice. And last night she stayed in her crib until at least 3 or 3:30 am. WOW!!! I won't expect a repeat of that tonight but it would be nice. It is hard to believe that I have not slept through a night in almost 16 months. It was something that I really worried about while I was pregnant. But it has been pretty manageable in the end. I wonder how I might be different when I do end up sleeping through the night one day in the next few years.
My dinner menu tonight was chicken soup with barley, mashed squash and pumpkin, and salad with beets in it. My first time cooking dinner since I got here. It was a success. No complaints from the peanut gallery. In fact, they liked it. So success.

Red Leaves

Sundays...hmmm. Well, the time changed. Falling back on an extra hour. How nice to actually gain time. Wouldn't it be nice if we could just ask for an extra hour here and there when we needed it. "They" could just tack on an extra hour to our day once in a while. But no taking hours away from us. I guess if we need extra hours to our day then it really means that we need to think about how to rebalance our time to a healthier way of being.
We went to the park just below my mom's house for a photo shoot in the red leaves. Johari wants to be the photographer though.
We also went across the street to play with her friend, Julia. And I got to eat a delicious rice soup with 1000 year old eggs in it. (Not really 1000 years old). The inside egg is black and the shell was green. An intense and very rich flavor. I liked it. Inside of the rice soup which felt like serious comfort food.
So, yesterday Marvin told me that my astrological chart has some rough times in it right now and ahead. And I always listen to that stuff with a grain of salt and a feeling like there is some kind of truth to it too. A long time ago, I tried to come up with a "scientific" theory on how there could be some truth to astrological charting. I figured that the various gravitational pulls or energy forces of the planets must have some effect on us. How it all plays out, I do not claim to understand. And there obviously may not be any truth to my little theory either. But one can't help but try to understand how these mystical types of things may have some truth to them in a scientific sort way.
Johari got down the steps today on her own--going down backwards. I had left her to come up at one point and saw that she came part way up and then when I went back to check on her she was all the way back downstairs. So I knew that she could do it if she really wanted to. So next time we were coming all the way down the stairs I encouraged her to do it on her own. And she managed to go all the way down with a few complaints for the complaint department along the way. If she can practice this a bit more, she will really have full reign of the whole house.

praise

The other day, Johari and I were over at a friend's house. And she was praising Johari for little things she was doing, like getting up on the couch on her own. In a short period of time, I saw the effect of such praise. She started looking for that claps and "Good, Johari!!" as soon as she would do the same action. It was incredible to me how quickly praise could take over the motivation. Yet, praising the little ones is so much a part of our culture.

To the Zoo

We went to the zoo this afternoon - my mom, Lua (an 8 year old, dear friend), Johari and me. It was Johari's first visit to the zoo. She seemed to be pretty into looking at the animals. She watched them and pointed and signed about them. The only part that scared me was that she wanted to sit on the edge of every fence leading to these dangerous animals (I didn't let her, but she sure wanted to get close. Get to the edge.) I personally could watch the gorillas for hours and hours. Johari seemed pretty mesmerized by them. But Lua was ready to move on to find bats and "night creatures". So we found tigers, lions, hippos and snakes.
I woke up the other morning and realized that the days are super short and only going to get shorter. I couldn't believe that the days will be this short for the next few months. I hope I can make it through that. I guess if I just stay focused on parenting, maybe I won't realize that the sun is coming up so late and going down so early.
I slacked on running today. I had the intention and I didn't make it happen. I have to work harder to make it a habit. Otherwise I am going to blow up.
Johari hadn't wanted to take a bath or wash her hair in a few days, but she had fun in the bath tub this evening. She also had fun hanging out on the couch with her Grandpa Marvin. Johari is not as fearful of the puppy dog, Merlin. It is definitely a gradual process, but I see progress.
There are a few beautiful red trees next to the pond in the park below the house. The leaves all over the ground under the tree are gorgeous.
Sweet potatoes may be a magical food. I have to look into it some more.

Another Leg in the Journey

Well, we took a train to the West. And we are trying to get situated here. Figure out how we fit in. Create community for ourselves. I haven't blogged since March and I was never very consistent at it. But I think I should try. Try to figure out how to not be hung up on who is reading what.
Today, we were supposed to go to a mama's group playdate that I found on Meetup.com. But I never received the info on where the playdate was so we went to take a little hike at the Meadowdale Trail. By pure coincidence, a friend, Hyon, showed up about 5 mintues after we got there. So we had a nice walk together and went to her house for lunch. Johari played with Lua's (her 8 year old daughter) toys.
Last night, Carmel who is now 7 1/2 months old came over with her p's. Johari was so excited to play with baby Carmel. It made her very happy to have a little one to shower with love. I am sure she is going through Malcolm withdrawl.
Baby-proofing a house is no joke. The bigger the house the more there is to get into. The more there is to have to clean up. That is why I always dream of having a small house just the size of the apartment we were living in at Cecily's house. Just the right size for us.
I think Johari is warming up to Merlin, the puppy dog, a bit. She is still afraid of him getting too close, but I think I saw less complaints from her this morning when he was around. I end up holding her most of the time that he is around. Thank goodness that Merlin has a job to go to every day so that my arms can get a little bit of a rest.